The Little Book of Less=More (How to change your life by doing less)

Subject so far this month: The Miracle of Less= More, FUN, 85 Years Old, Visualisations, Affirmations, My Possibility, Change Now! Have a Break, Roles in Life, My Updates, Organic Growth, More, Self Promotion, More of the Less Bit, Organic Goals, Goals, Vision and Action, Newspapers, TV, Sleep, Less, Introduction.

 

Thursday 31st January 2002

The Miracle of Less=More

Once you’ve set up the three columns of Less Equal More, you can see clearly what you’re going to Less Of, and what you’re going to do More Of.

 

But these aren’t absolutes.  Less TV means Less TV.  It doesn’t mean No TV.  On the other hand when you are doing something that is in the Less Of column, like watching TV you realise that by doing that, you are less likely to reach your goals and dreams.

 

On the other hand by doing some More Of things you’re more likely to achieve your dreams and goals.

 

And sometime just doing some More Of things that appear to have very little connection with your Dream and Goals take you towards the Goal.

 

That’s the miracle and magic of Less=More.

 

Wednesday 30th January 2002

FUN

Whoops, I forgot about FUN.  Yes, you can have some of that in life.  Not all the time mind you, you need a bit of contrast otherwise you wouldn’t know what FUN is!

 

Yes, make sure you’re having more Fun in life.  I often forget myself to have more Fun. But my real problem is realising I don’t always know what would be Fun.

 

Here’s an exercise.  Try this, it’s taken from my favourite book “The Artist’s Way – Julia Cameron”

 

Write down “I wish”, 18 times down the left side of a blank piece of paper, and write down after that “I especially wish” at the bottom.

Now quickly fill in the 19 wishes as fast as possible.

 

Interesting isn’t it?

After you’ve wished for loads of money and good health for everyone you know.

You can start to get trivial.

 

I call this living a $15m dollar lifestyle.  Because that was my first wish.

After that I can get trivial like

 

Not all of the 19 wishes need money or acts of God.  It means that parts of the 19 wishes are trivial things that you can do every day.

And you know what?

The 19 wishes all come together.

So start fulfilling the easy wishes and the rest will follow.

 

I’m off for a lovely Cup of Tea.

             

Tuesday 29th January 2002

85 Years Old

A good example of the visualisations, without even visualising is the following exercise.

 

Imagine you are 85.  What advice would you give yourself now (at your current age)?

Imagine you are 7.  What advice would you give yourself now (at your current age)?

 

It just goes to show that we have most of the answers and wisdom within ourselves.

 

Monday 28th January 2002

Visualisations

Okay another one to have a go at are Visualisations.

 

Find somewhere quiet.  Failed already eh?

 

There a various techniques for then relaxing.  I’ve always found the simplest one is to concentrate on your breathe and specifically the air flowing in and out of you nostrils.  Sounds weird but give it a go.

 

There are many books that offer guided visualisations and tapes.

 

Most visualisations normally take you to your favourite place, a safe place, or a desert island.

Once on the Island and relaxed you can either continue to relax, visualise what it is you really want, or ask anyone wandering through your visualisation for the meaning of life or any other question.

 

Many scoff at visualisations.  Sound a bit “New Age”, but believe me, they work.  And some of my most powerful memories and discoveries are from visualisations.

 

Sunday 27th January 2002

Affirmations

Many people and Many books, swear by affirmations.

 

So what have you got to lose by developing one?

The only problem I have is Steve Coogan as Gareth Cheeseman the cheesy “Grrrrr you’re a Tiger” Microsell salesman.

He took my best line away.

 

Seriously, I was a Tiger (but without the Grrrrrrr)

When I had squash coaching and before all this be an animal shit came out my Egyptian squash coach used to say,

“Tony, be like a tiger on the court, crouch ready to spring.” er yes.

 

So when I was doing an exercise or reading a book where I had to think of an animal, Tiger came along.

 

Make what you want to be, be in the present.

“I am an Artist”

“I am a photographer”

“I have $15,000,000”

 

Affirmations can be anything you want them to be.  Just two rules,

  1. Write it down
  2. Try saying it out aloud (but don’t sound like Gareth Cheesman)

 

What have you got to lose?

Give it a go

 

Saturday 26th January 2002

My Possibility

See things as possible rather than absolute.  Go easy on yourself.

Rather than things having to happen, see the possibility of them happening.

 

Try and see possibility in everything.  All things are possible no matter how unlikely.

 

What possibility would you like to see for yourself?

What possibility would you like for the world?

 

I did this exercise where I constructed a sentence (an affirmation) about possibility.

Possibility for myself and possibility for the world.  Here it is and I’ll explain how I arrived at it.

 

Who I am is the Possibility of

INTEGRITY   CREATIVITY   INSPIRATION   LOVE   FUN

This is who I am

 

What possibility could I stick to no matter what the situation?

What possibility would get me out of bed on a cold wet windy day?

 

The first word that came to mind was INTEGRITY.  I have a big thing about Integrity for myself and hope in others.

Possibility of Integrity is not something to beat other people up with but a hope of Integrity in them by me showing Integrity.

Integrity not only means honesty, but wholeness, like a bicycle wheel missing a spoke lacks wholeness, Integrity.

(I look at the current Enron and Arthur Andersen situation and it makes me seethe with anger at the lack of Integrity.

This isn’t supposed to be how to be with possibility but there you go)

 

Secondly, I love Creativity and Design.  I love developing my own creativity and I love good design.

 

Inspiration.  I love to inspire, it’s my purpose in life.  I love to be inspired.

 

And finally at the time Love.  When I first created my possibility it was with Integrity, Creativity and Inspiration.

There was something missing.  And then I watched someone else declare their possibility.  And I realised that Love was missing for me.

 

Finally, a few year later, I realised that I want more Fun in my life and more Fun for others, so they you are.

 

Integrity Creativity Inspiration Love Fun

 

This is who I am.

 

And on a bad day, I see others as lacking the Integrity and Love that I have.

And I’m hard on myself for not having enough Creativity and Inspiration.

Oh, and the Fun goes.

 

But most of the time my possibility really works for me.

 

What’s your possibility?

 

Friday 25th January 2002

Change Now!

Oops, I’ve copied today’s Lazy Salesman and yesterdays Weblog into here which is where it’s most relevant.

 

“How do you go on an effective diet?

How do you stop smoking?

How do you stop drinking?

In short, you do it and it’s done.

Then you work like hell for the rest of your life to stay on the weight-maintenance, non-smoking, or booze-free wagon…”

Tom Peters “Pursuit of WoW!”

 

It’s true isn’t it, change is easy.  You make a decision now to change!  It’s keeping it going.

But it’s a good reminder that you can change anything, starting now.

Change is easy, very easy.  You can decide now that you’re going to change, in a split microsecond.

 

It’s keeping the change going that’s the difficult bit!

 

But think about it.  You could decide from the second of reading this that you will make more calls, call a senior executive, network with someone you’ve been meaning to, give up smoking, stop eating so much.  Whatever.

 

Profound.  Make the change now!

 

Thursday 24th January 2002

Have a Break

Sometime you have to have a Break to change the perspective.

 

 

Break the routine.  I’m always struck by some of the greatest ideas and inventions coming out of the lull, being in the Doldrums.  Reading “The New New Thing” by Michael Lewis about Jim Clark the founder of Silicon Graphics and Netscape, the idea that he’d go off to sulk on a sailing boat for a few months and gather his thoughts, whilst literally stuck in the Doldrums has always stuck with me.

 

Wednesday 23rd January 2002

Roles in Life

What are your Roles in Life?

What would you like your Roles in Life to be?

 

Spend a few minutes thinking about that; there’s no right and wrong answers.

Husband Parent Worker Earner Teacher Guru Coach SportsStar Leader

Whatever!

 

They should be things you really want from life or are in life.

 

Let these roles guide you and help you set the Goals that you want from each of these roles.

Spend a bit of time each week achieving these Goals as part of your roles in life.

 

Easy Really isn’t it?

 

Tuesday 22nd January 2002

My Updates

Just started updating my own Less=More for 2002.

 

I need to create some more time to do all this writing, so it’s going to have to be less reading of other people’s stuff, less on-line news, less magazines, less football news, even less TV.

 

I want to do more things that create something – content.

 

And less of the things that are nice to read, but “So What?” Nothing to show for having read them.

 

Tuesday 15th January 2002

Organic Growth

Once you have your three columns of More = Less filled and your goal written on the top, it’s amazing how the miracles start to happen.

 

The first thing to say is that none of this is fixed and can be changed at any time if it’s not working.

 

Also if something is in the less of column like TV, it doesn’t mean no TV but what it does mean is that when your watching TV you’re in the “Less Of” column, and you’re doing something which is less likely to help you with reaching your goal.  The more you do things in the Less column the more likely you are to not achieve the impossible goal.

 

Conversely, the more you do things in the “More” column the more likely you are to achieve your goal.  That’s why it important to have some fun things in the More column so that it’s not an onerous set of tasks.

 

And I’ve found it really weird.  I can have things in the More column and I can’t see the connection with my goal like “Dance”.  Sometimes I don’t even know whey I have the word in or what it means.  I put “Dance” in to represent more fun, even though I don’t dance and haven’t danced for years.  Within 3 weeks I’d been to 3 functions and “Danced” and it was weird because being weddings I was dancing with people I never had the guts to be on the dance floor with when I was teenager.

 

Does any of this make sense?  No.  That’s because I’ve written this ahead of describing everything else and I’ve not put up a completed example yet.

 

Monday 14th January 2002

More

What do you want More of in Life?

 

Write it down.  Mine comes to lots more than my Less of column.

The things you want more of, don’t necessarily link to what your dream or goal is that you’ve written down.

But a few things in that will help you directly achieve your goal.  Things like,

 

You may get a sense of something you’d like to do more of, but isn’t directly connected with your dream or goal.

Write it down.

Things like Dance, Yoga, Time Out, Walking, Parachuting, Hang Gliding, Bungee Jumping, Time with Family.

They may not link to your dream but have them there in your more of column anyway.

 

Living Less=More shouldn’t be an onerous task.  I’ll explain more on another day.

 

Some people want more time with family, some may want less time with family.  There’s no right and wrong here, just what suits you.

 

Also, these columns aren’t fixed in stone, if something isn’t working for you then change it.  Move it to another column.

 

The strangest thing is things happen in way unexpected in the More of column.  You put More of something and strange things happen.

 

I put More Football one year.  I wasn’t sure if it meant playing Football, watching Football, going to Football games.  I just knew I wanted more Football.

3 months after writing More Football down I was talking to a friend, and he could see that I was keen on football.  He had a friend who was running a brainstorming session on what to do with Luton Football Club.  Would I like to come to the brainstorming?  Would I like to, you bet.

So off we went for a 3 hours brainstorm in the boardroom overlooking the pitch on what to do with Luton FC.  Amazing.

 

A few months later I went skiing with a friend. A guy in the chalet asked us which football club we supported.

Man Utd.  Why who do you support?

Well, in a way Celtic.

Why “in a way”?

I work for Celtic.

Oh what do you do?

I’m the Financial Director!

 

Well we had the time of our lives.  10 day in the chalet with the FD of Celtic talking football, footy gossip, footy opinion.

He even asked us who we thought they should get as their new manager.  This was a few months after they’d sacked John Barnes and they hadn’t appointed anyone for a few months.

Quick as a flash I said,

“Martin O’Neill, you can try him out a Celtic for a few years and then if he’s successful we’ll have him at Man Utd.”

 

So Celtic fans, you have me to thank for Celtic’s brilliant appointment, now can we have Martin and Henryk Larssen at Man Utd.

Thanks

 

Sunday 13th January 2002

One of the Routes to Success – Self Promotion

One thing that nearly all famous people have in common is that they self promote themselves.

 

They ask themselves, “Who can I be talking to today who’ll make a difference to me?”

 

Self Promoters have three things in common.

 

  1. They Network
  2. They Persist
  3. The Have a memorable style

 

Think of some famous self promoters.  Richard Branson, Chris Evans, Spice Girls, Tony Bair, Ronald Reagan.

Think of famous or rich people who you don’t think are worth what they earn.

Are they the best at what they do?

So how have they got there to do what they do?

 

Firstly they Network.  They talk to people. People who can help them, or people know people who can help them.

And they keep networking and networking.

Some do it naturally, some learn to do it.

 

Secondly, they stick at it.  What ever life throws at them they hang in there.  Most of the people who we see now as famous even the ones overnight, have been at it for long time.  Check out the TV programmes about Stars before they were famous.  Nearly all of them have footage of them.  Why is this?  They Persist.

 

Thirdly, they have a memorable style.  What is it about them that get them noticed?  Some have it naturally and some build it.  Some keep reinventing themselves.

The Spice Girls is a good example.  Are they the best at what they do in terms of singing? No but they are memorable.

Memorable doesn’t even have to be fashionable, as long as it gets you noticed and remembered.

 

If you want success then you have to self promote yourself.

 

 

Saturday 12th January 2002

More of the LESS bit

So what else are you going to give up?  As well as TV and Newspapers, what is it that uses up time that you may be prepared to give up, or reduce.

It also depends on how badly you want to change, or achieve a goal or how quickly you want to achieve it.

 

Sometimes you need to reframe what you do to create a MORE thing.  A lot of people say travelling to work, commuting as a LESS thing.  Maybe it’s what you do when you travel to work that uses up time and you could best put what you do when travelling to better use.  Instead of reading the newspaper or listening to the radio, is there something else which would help you achieve your goal.  A few examples

 

 

Somehow you’re trying to change your 24 hours into something which helps you.

And clearly “If you keep on doing what you do your going to keep on getting what you’ve got.” Or

“If you want to know how you got here look at your past, if you want to know where you’re going plan your future.” Something like that.

 

And if you don’t want things to change or it seems to onerous then fine, keep it, change something else.  If golf is really important to you and one of the things the life is all about, then keep the golf.  Maybe restrict it to a fixed time every week.

 

What you’re trying to get to here is a column of things you’re going to do LESS of.

 

Friday 11th January 2002

Organic Goals

It’s all well and good having goals, which I remind you, are Dreams with Actions.

Great eh?  I Dream of a Ferrari and if I save $200 dollars per month for 20 years I might just pick up a second hand one before I die, maybe.

 

The problem is as I’ve said before, that people don’t stick at things for very long.  Can’t see the light.  Get bored.  Lose sight of the long term.  Lose motivation.  Didn’t really want it that much in the first place.

 

An organic goal is to just to leave a dream as a dream.  Still decide what you want no matter how impossible it is, write it down, picture it in you mind, find pictures or create pictures of it if possible.

 

And leave it at that.

 

Let your mind and other forces (if you believe in it) work on it.  Don’t be so hard on yourself.  The brain is a magnificent thing, which once you put something in there, it works on finding a solution even when you consciously switch off to it.  So go on, give it a try and set a goal, something you’d like, and when you’d like it by.

 

I’ll say more about this later when the other parts are complete.

 

All my dreams have come true, sometimes in obscure ways and often in a longer time than I expected.

I had the idea for the name of my company TGtips, 6 years ago, I only just set the company up recently.

The website name was registered nearly 2 years ago and it took me over a year to get email working, and nearly 18 months for the website.

My dream of living by the sea is only 3 miles away now.

Having children has taken me over 11 years to come true.

 

I once thought success would be 3 skiing holidays a year.  The time and money to do that would be a good reflection of doing well.  But sometimes dreams come true in an unexpected way.  Within a year I’d had 3 skiing holidays.

In 1995 I booked to go skiing in April ’96, I then won a skiing holiday at work and went to Aspen in Feb’96 before the holiday I’d booked.  I then went skiing at Christmas 1996 which is really the following season.  And then I realised that I’d skied 3 times in 1996.  Shit, that’s not what I meant when I dreamt of 3 skiing holidays!

 

So be careful of what you ask for, it might come true, and it might come true in unexpected ways.

 

So now I live near the sea, I have a detached house to play loud music in, I have driveway to park the car on (unheard of in London), I work from home and spend lots of time with my daughter, which has always been me biggest dream.  And Sunshine.  The twist is that I’m in Melbourne now and the house is rented, but my dreams have come true, I just had to move over 10,000 mile to achieve them!  I should have been more specific with my dreams.

 

Just the £15,000,000 by 2006, to achieve, and I’ll be sorted.

 

And it’s not impossible, I heard yesterday that a friend of a friend set up a company 9 months ago and sold it to a competitor for £5,000,000.  He’s never been in business and left his previous employment 6 months ago to grow his thing full time.  And you know what, I don’t think he set up the company and left his employer of 20 years for the money, he loved what he’d started doing.

 

More on that another time.

 

Thursday 10th January 2002

Goals

“How can you hit a target you can’t even see?” as Zig Ziglar asks us.

 

The oft quoted story, often quoted differently, but along the lines of the students at Harvard who had written down their goals achieve more later in life than the rest.

The 5%.  Those that don’t end break even or in poverty later in life.

 

What is a goal?  Simple, a dream with actions.

 

 

 

So simple, learn to Dream.  That’s easier said than done.  Most people are afraid to dream.  They fear their dreams won’t come true.

But actually it’s the other way round.  Dare to dream.  Write them down and they come true.  And besides, the oft quoted Nelson Mandela speech about not hiding your light under a bushel tells that we play too small.

 

There are some exercises to do to help you to dream.  Try these;

 

  1. What would you DO, HAVE, BE with $10m?
  2. It’s your 85th Birthday party; four people make a speech about you, a family member, a friend, Michael Parkinson, a work colleague. What would you like them to say?
  3. What would you do with 6 months to live and unlimited funds?
  4. Describe the Perfect Day hour by hour with unlimited funds.

 

Okay, go dream away.

 

And when you’ve done that pick 5 dreams which stand out.  A goal becomes a dream with actions.

When are you going to achieve that dream and what you need to do to get there?

 

I say all this to give you an idea of what Goals are.  Most people don’t dream, most people don’t stick at the actions and can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.  It’s difficult.  That’s why I’m writing all this to give an alternative.

 

But nevertheless, it’s still important to set a goal, no matter how crazy and unrealistic it is.  And write it down.

 

Wednesday 9th January 2002

Vision and Action

People either have Vision or Action, or if lucky have both.  Some have neither.

Vision is the ability to see the broader picture, have dreams, and look into the future.

 

Vision is driven by creativity.  Being creative.  Being open to being creative.

Action is driven by motivation.  Getting on with it.

 

An organisation needs both, preferably both in its leaders but not necessarily but this is where many organisations fall down.

Their leaders either lack Vision or Action, and don’t compensate with the people around to make up for what is missing.

 

Visionaries with no-one to put it into action.

Action driven with no vision.

 

Go and try it with the people you know.  Open a spreadsheet or on a piece of paper, draw 4 columns.

Both. Vision. Action. Neither.

Now add yourself and all the people you know.  Work colleagues, friends, family, anyone else, and ask yourself which column they fall in.

A pattern quickly develops of where people sit, and what is missing in some situations.

   Text Box: VISION

 

People fall into one of these 4 areas or somewhere on this diagram.

The added twist is that you can be one of these 4, but are you satisfied?

Satisfied Couch Potato, I can think of nothing better as long as you never become dissatisfied.

If you’re a dissatisfied Couch Potato then you have a number of choices.

So the issue isn’t necessarily what you are on this diagram as much as your attitude towards what you are.

The dangerous one is dissatisfied Branson.  Think of the number of rich and famous that have “made it” and still it’s not enough.

The often turn to drugs, drink, speed, outrageous risks, affairs, just to get their kicks.

 

But let’s all at least try and get there so that we can become dissatisfied.

 

Tuesday 8th January 2002 10-48

Newspapers

I’m addicted to Newspapers.  If I buy one, I have to read it cover to cover.  If I see one lying around I have to read it cover to cover.

For me and many others, newspapers take up a huge amount of my time.  I want to be informed, know what’s going in the world, catch those magic articles, sports analysis.  The wrongs of Man Utd.

 

Somehow I’ve overcome the addiction.  A bit like chocolate.  If I don’t buy it I can’t get addicted to it.

 

I think newspaper reading is a great thing, but ask yourself this, after you’ve finished reading the newspaper cover to cover what do you have to show for it?

I could have written several world famous novels in the time I’ve spent reading newspapers.

 

I blame Dad, sitting on the toilet, door unlocked, trousers down, newspaper open.

 

Monday 7th January 2002 11-23

TV

Without doubt the greatest modern curse and use/waste of time is Television.  If you’re looking to gain a few hours a day in your life, then restrict the amount of television you’re watching.

 

Ask yourself this,

“Is the amount of TV I’m watching, contributing or denying me the dreams and goals I’d like to achieve in life?”

TV is great, I love TV, I’m a child of the 60s, I grew up with the telly on in the background, Scooby Doo, Thunderbirds, Stingray, UK Sitcoms, Blue Peter, Comedy.  And now the modern curse American Sitcoms which are totally addictive.  With cable TV you can construct a 24 hours menu of good sitcoms.  Friends, Frazier, Seinfeld, Just Shoot Me, Larry Sanders, Rosanne, Married with Kids, Dream On, Wonder Years, Absolutely Fab, there’s a great UK sitcom called Coupling.  Try Cold Feet.  And of course the best of all The Simpsons (and its relative Futurama)

 

See look, I’m addicted again already.  All I’m saying is if you can’t have less sleep, and I won’t let most of you have less sleep, then something has to give in the 24 hours of your day.  Keep the favourites, plan the favourites, watch the favourites, be inspired by your favourites.  The Simpsons and Matt Groening inspire me.

 

It Mr Flicky that’s the problem, your dark and addictive side (especially blokes) that want to stay up beyond 10-00 and flick the channels looking for something funny or voyeuristic.

 

If you’re not going to give up TV or reduce the time or be more disciplined about it, what are you going to give up?

 

How big and real and desirable are your dreams?

 

Me, sometimes I’d just rather watch back to back Simpsons than anything in life.

 

Sunday 6th January 2002 12-40

Sleep

When I ask people what are they going to do less of, to create more time for the things they want to do more off, invariably they think they want to sacrifice a bit of sleep.

Unless you’re Maggie Thatcher or Winston Churchill this ain't going to work

 

I ask people to put up their hands if they think they are having too much sleep.

Almost no-one says yes to having too much sleep.

 

Most people need the same amount of sleep they are having, or more sleep.

 

There is a trick here to create more time without changing the number of hours of sleep.

 

I call it 10-5.

 

Go to bed at 10-00pm and wake up at 5-00am.  Most people look at me in horror.  They only hear the 5-00am bit.  But actually it’s 7 hours sleep.

That would be good enough for most people.

Waking up at 5-00 is great.  Once you’ve woken up.  It’s quiet.  Nobody to disturb you.  Time to play with.  Few distractions.  You’ve created precious time.

How has that happened?

Well you’ve given up the “Flicking” Hours.  The time between 10-00 and 12-00 in the evening when most blokes are flicking the remote control aimlessly trying to find a programme that will hold their attention.  What women do during the Flicking Hours I don’t know, I’ve never noticed because I’m too busy being hypnotised by the 57 channels and nothing on.

 

You’ve given up a few hours of aimless TV to create some time in the morning to think about World Domination, or whatever it is that you want to change.

If you don’t want to change, fine, go back on to the couch, you potato.

 

Am I currently getting up at 5-00am in the morning.  Am I hell!

You don’t think I practise what I preach do you? 

Tony, 2002 resolution, go back to 10-5 as you did at the start of 2001.

 

Saturday 5th January 2002 11-54

LESS

The key to any change, that’s if we want to change (reminder to talk about Vision and Action) is to ask what are we going to change?

 

What are we actually going to do differently?

We could just change perception of the situation but let’s save that for later.

 

What are you going to change?

What Action is going to change?

 

The easiest way I’ve found to change things is to look at it this way.

 

There are 24 hours in the day, if you want things to change, you’re going to have to change something about those 24 hours.

We’re born, we live, we die, there 24 hours in the day

Or to quote Ruby Wax,

“Men, what can you say about me, they’re born, they grow a stomach and then they die.”

 

What in the 24 hours are you going to change to make a difference and help you achieve world domination or whatever your unrealistic goal is?

 

What are you going to do More of?

What are you going to do Less of?

What are you going to do Equal of?

 

That will make a difference to your life and will lead to you achieving your unrealistic goal?  Let me repeat it again

 

What are you going to do More of?

What are you going to do Less of?

What are you going to do Equal of?

 

Let’s start with the painful bit first.  What are you going to less of?  What are you going to sacrifice to free up the time to do the things you should be doing to achieve that unrealistic goal?

 

Friday 4th January 2002 22-54

Introduction

I’ll explain what it’s all about on another day but I’m going to copy and paste part of what I’ve already written about how I came to arrive at this idea.

 

The Chinese have a saying

 

“A three thousand mile journey starts with one step”

 

This is largely bollocks.

More like three thousand well intentioned journeys are given up after 20 steps.

That’s why there’s so many Chinese walking around.

Why is that?  Why are so many well intentioned journeys given up so easily and so quickly?

New Years resolutions, dieting, giving up smoking, learning something new, etc etc?

 

I was driving through London in mid 1999 past the Landmark Hotel where I was married, and I received news that my ex wife, (the one I’d married in the Landmark Hotel), had just moved in with the “Perfect Man”.

I was upset.

I’m not the perfect man, I don’t cook, can’t dance, and I only have 10 witticisms which I use up after the 6th date when hopeful they’re already hooked.

 

Yes upset with my ex wife and Mr Perfect, who seems to have all the same things I have except he’s the one after me.

Right that does it I said to myself, from today (July 1999) things are going to change, I’m going to change my life (yet again), I’ll show them, I’m going to earn so much money I can sort out the things that need sorting out.

 

Yeh Yeh Yeh Tony.  Why is this time going to be different from all the other times?  All those promises to yourself in the past, all those three thousand mile journeys that end on the 27th page of the latest self help book.  I thought about it and it came to me in a flash.  I remembered what David Hunt (the brother of James Hunt the Grand Prix driver) had said. 

 

What are you going to give up, what are you going to sacrifice for things to change.

 

Here are a few more quotes for you.  The best books always seem to have quotes which seem very wise and memorable at the time, but are forgotten with the turn of the page.

 

 

But how can this all be achieved without yet another given up three thousand mile journey?

How can sacrifice be fun, just like the latest diet fad?

By the way, most of the best self help books like this one are brilliant at telling you all the symptoms of your ills which has you nodding in agreement vigorously over the first 26 page, the solution is always less palatable – the remaining 203 pages.  The recipe pages as I call them.

 

So my recipe came to me in a flash, I was now on the A40 flyover just past the Paddington St Mary’s behind me and my left, on my way to train today’s poor souls in Old Windsor.  What amazing words of wisdom would I give them today which wouldn’t change their lives, or even their day?

 

What was going to change this time, I’m now by the White City turn off.

Sacrifice, oh please no.  But seriously, what was going to change this time.

 

Well firstly I’m a strong believer in setting Goals, to use the oft quoted and misquoted example in many self help books and I won’t be any different, in the 1950s (and on recent tape I heard it was the 80s) either at Harvard or at Yale, research was done on a group of graduates over 30 years to see which ones were successful later in life.  Those that had goals when they were young and most importantly had written them down were the 5% who had been successful later in life, so the route of all success is written goals. 

 

So today, what is my written goal going to be that will solve all my ills and fend of the evil ex wife and her perfect lover.  It didn’t take long £100,000 now.  The thing about goals is that they are dreams with a timescale and actions.  At least all my failed goals are dreams with actions.  Either my Ferrari car and five bedroom house in Hertfordshire are too far in the future, like 10-15 years, or as I’ve repeated incessantly, I’m a quitter after 20 steps.

 

So this time I got greedy, I decided I wanted the money now, well not today and not in 5 years time, I decided I was going to be earning £100,000 p.a by July 2000 in one years time.  Now how the hell was I going to be achieving this and why would I not quit this time.  Well firstly the best way is to cheat.  I knew that if worst came to worst by Jan 2000 I could go back to selling instead of training and bluff my way into £100k on target job with a guarantee that would pay me the equivalent of £100k over the first 6 months until I was found out, after all I’d been training the ICL Salesforce for the last 3 years for how they too can make their £100k on target sales target.

 

I digress, give me the money now, show me the money.  I set a totally unrealistic target of £100k by next year doing what I enjoyed doing – training, with a fallback of going back into sales if it didn’t work by Jan 2000.  Actually, looking back it doesn’t seem so unachievable now.  Did I achieve it?  You don’t think I’d be sitting in Melbourne writing this book if I’d achieved it do you?  I’ll tell more later.

 

So back to the £100k p.a by June 2000.  What was going to change this time to make it work?  We’re 2 page into the book and I can’t hold back any more I’m going to give you the solution to all your ills, I’m not going to wait until page 56 and fill the rest of the book with recipes.  It’s simple.